Hibiscus power, eh? Your Krytonite analogy is amazing. If you're going to create a superhero he/she has to have a weakness. I doubt that Siegel had thought it through - but maybe he had. Maybe Superman is far more complex than it appears.
Wow, a powerful load of vulnerability there, Ros. As usual, you somehow managed to make me chuckle a few times too! My birth family was a loving one but certainly had plenty of emotional damage and dysfunction, about which my two siblings and I (now all heading into, through or beyond our sixties) are still in communication: some lasting streaks of Kryptonite among the gems to be sure. And yes, totally agree about taking responsibility for one's own healing as the first best step to setting the world (from one's close relationships outward) aright. Thank you again. Hibiscus Power! Love it. Jamie.
Thank you, Jamie! As always, happy to make you laugh. I was worried this one was a little bit more serious after the last two, but yes, I like to throw in some leavening humour along the way. Laughter is my favourite antidote to feeling any of the negative emotions. It’s pretty much the lead box to contain the toxic radiation!
Thoughtful, insightful wisdom, for which you have found the words. That you for being so open about yourself, risking vulnerability in order to help us all. That shows real character.
Thank you, Daniel. I find I can’t write anything worthwhile unless I’m prepared to utterly expose myself! The upside is that it means I can connect with you, and I’m grateful for that. Thank you for saying this.
Your analogy to kryptonite as a piece of home was brilliant, and the whole essay was thoughtful and provocative. Sorry about your estranged one; odds are, it isn't your fault.
Well it was really Jerry Siegel’s analogy and suddenly, while I was mulling over familial relations this week, it hit me between the eyes! And then I just knew I had to write about it.
In the end it’s a little bit of everyone’s fault, or no-one’s; we’re all flawed, we all mess up, despite trying to do our best, and sometimes families bring into close contact somewhat incompatible personalities! I hope it won’t be permanent but we’ll have to see. I’m sure the personal growth ‘payout’ will prove to be valuable, for me, at least.
It's strange that we met in our 20's but lost touch when our work paths parted in the last century but this actual week you wrote this piece that I totally relate to.
I have a destructive relationship with my elder brother and we tolerate each other, at best. This week, though, he has had to have life-changing surgery to fix the abuse he has directed at his own body - presumably because I wasn't near by to receive it - and that aura of familiral sympathy for the pain he's going through was felt by me subconsciously.
It made me angry that I found myself caring about him and his future when I know he will not change his habits to change his life, and this is the start of a decline where I possibly have a duty of care, even though as children, he cared little for me or our mother.
It’s quite a striking coincidence, isn’t it! That it happens to be so relevant to your week in the very week you bump into me in Substack via our both following Tom Cox. And I love that this is so often how the world works - the right thing at the right moment.
I’m sorry about the situation with your brother. That sounds very painful and frustrating.
A wonderful post, I can relate to this.
Thank you, Nikki.
What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing. 🙏❤️
Thank you, Joy. I’m very glad it resonated with you.
Excellent read. Thank you.
Thanks for reading!
Hibiscus power, eh? Your Krytonite analogy is amazing. If you're going to create a superhero he/she has to have a weakness. I doubt that Siegel had thought it through - but maybe he had. Maybe Superman is far more complex than it appears.
Well, if he hadn’t thought it through, it was one of those strokes of unconscious genius. Thanks, Roger.
Wow, a powerful load of vulnerability there, Ros. As usual, you somehow managed to make me chuckle a few times too! My birth family was a loving one but certainly had plenty of emotional damage and dysfunction, about which my two siblings and I (now all heading into, through or beyond our sixties) are still in communication: some lasting streaks of Kryptonite among the gems to be sure. And yes, totally agree about taking responsibility for one's own healing as the first best step to setting the world (from one's close relationships outward) aright. Thank you again. Hibiscus Power! Love it. Jamie.
Thank you, Jamie! As always, happy to make you laugh. I was worried this one was a little bit more serious after the last two, but yes, I like to throw in some leavening humour along the way. Laughter is my favourite antidote to feeling any of the negative emotions. It’s pretty much the lead box to contain the toxic radiation!
Thoughtful, insightful wisdom, for which you have found the words. That you for being so open about yourself, risking vulnerability in order to help us all. That shows real character.
Thank you, Daniel. I find I can’t write anything worthwhile unless I’m prepared to utterly expose myself! The upside is that it means I can connect with you, and I’m grateful for that. Thank you for saying this.
Your analogy to kryptonite as a piece of home was brilliant, and the whole essay was thoughtful and provocative. Sorry about your estranged one; odds are, it isn't your fault.
Well it was really Jerry Siegel’s analogy and suddenly, while I was mulling over familial relations this week, it hit me between the eyes! And then I just knew I had to write about it.
In the end it’s a little bit of everyone’s fault, or no-one’s; we’re all flawed, we all mess up, despite trying to do our best, and sometimes families bring into close contact somewhat incompatible personalities! I hope it won’t be permanent but we’ll have to see. I’m sure the personal growth ‘payout’ will prove to be valuable, for me, at least.
It's strange that we met in our 20's but lost touch when our work paths parted in the last century but this actual week you wrote this piece that I totally relate to.
I have a destructive relationship with my elder brother and we tolerate each other, at best. This week, though, he has had to have life-changing surgery to fix the abuse he has directed at his own body - presumably because I wasn't near by to receive it - and that aura of familiral sympathy for the pain he's going through was felt by me subconsciously.
It made me angry that I found myself caring about him and his future when I know he will not change his habits to change his life, and this is the start of a decline where I possibly have a duty of care, even though as children, he cared little for me or our mother.
Maybe a bus will make a helpful intervention.
It’s quite a striking coincidence, isn’t it! That it happens to be so relevant to your week in the very week you bump into me in Substack via our both following Tom Cox. And I love that this is so often how the world works - the right thing at the right moment.
I’m sorry about the situation with your brother. That sounds very painful and frustrating.